About moi~

I think it's time to introduce myself to all my fans out there. It seems that this blog is getting more popular with repeat readers coming back for more of my almost daily rants. Heh..

I was born on the 5th of May 1981 (Which means I am only 24 this year, will still remain to be 24 the year after next and so on and so forth) and my name is Nor Idayu. (Nor = Nur = Light & Ayu = Beautiful. So the meaning behind my name is the 'Light Of Beauty' ROFL!!!). I am a part-time supermodel with an uncanny resemblance to Angelina Jolie. I just joined the X-Men a few months back, and right now I am being trained by Professor X to learn to control my telekinetic power. ;p~ *yeah, it's lame.. I know.. Bleah~~*

I grew up in Kallang Bahru but now I am staying in Ubi with my in-laws. Kallang will always have a special place in my heart because it was my playground and held so much fond childhood memories. Like, whenever it rains heavily and a tiny field next to my block is flooded, I will instantly recall the time when my friends and I collected a few hundreds of tadpoles there. We were hoping to make a few bucks by selling them after they turn into little froggies but they died the next day. I love splashing around barefooted in the mud, without a care in the world. That was until my mom screamed at me from the 3rd floor to go home and shower. Hahahaha..

Remember the old-fashion playground? Not the new colourful wimpy ones that they have now but the real deal. The ones filled with sand and hard concrete shaped like funny looking animals? I love those! There were a few of them around Kallang and my favourite was the one behind my block. There was a lot of tyres hung around the playground for kids to swing around like little Tarzans. We made it even better by putting a long wooded plank in between these tyres to connect them together. This method will create a huge swing, and we all would sat on the planks. Some of the brave ones (i.e me) will sit on the ends of the plank to swing it higher and higher till one of us fall down and die......

Just kidding!

Yes there were lots of bloody bruises and cuts but we just laughed it off. No one came home crying to get their parents to scold us. No parents have to make a big hoo-haa of it in the newspapers. You know why? Because we were tougher and are a lot cooler than the new generations. Hah! But it's really hard to be cool & tough when you are bending down and your mom was trying to remove a wooden splinter from your butt as a result from playing with wooden planks found near a contruction site.

Ok ok.. I've digressed.

Back to my introduction. I am the third child. The eldest is my Sis (Along), followed by my Bro (Abang Ngah), Me and lastly is my Lil Sis (Busu).
My mom is a homemaker cum traditional masseuse. She provides pre & post-natal massages as well. Ladies only. But if men are interested, I can refer you to my Dad. He uses the rolling pin (it's studded with rusty nails for added pleasure) though, so if you are into pain and torture, let me know okay?

My Dad currently works as a security guard in some condominium. He had retired from his another security guard job in Cisco but he can't rest yet. Funny how I used to dislike my father while I was a teenager but now I find him to be very endearing. I do love him very much but of course, it's not shown openly. He is a very hardworking man and selfless, taking overtimes to put all of us through tertiary educations. From the look on his face, I know he is tired from working so hard all his life.

Along, the eldest of us all, is the smallest. Hahaha.. Seriously! She's married, a homemaker and have 4 wonderful daughters. My favourite is Huda, so don't tell the rest, okay. ;p~ Anyway, I love babies. Once a new baby comes along, I will definitely fall in love all over again.
Her hubby is the infamous Abang Yunos from Themephotography. My wedding photos were sponsored by him and it was fantastic! (Mainly because the bride was gorgeous lah). Their princesses are Nadhira (Lolong), Haziqah (Ngangah), Nabila (Kak Cik) & Huda. They are a bunch of makcik kaypo and are so kecohrables & adorable. My eardrums are still ringing from the effect of their shrill voices. I personally think that all three of them can beat the X-Men Siren's superpower anytime anywhere. Hahaha.. I love them to bits! As you can read from my previous post, Along is expecting her 5th child. A son. Syukur Alhamdulillah~ Can't wait to see him in October. InsyaAllah~

Abang Ngah? He is just my annoying & irritating big brother. And he is still the same now even though he is 30 years old. He's the biggest among us and his tummy can rival my Sis (who is currently 4 months pregnant). I used to call him 'Beruang' because he was a big brute and very clumsy which really reminded me of the grizzly bear. He is also married and have a son with Kak Reena. We (as in me and bro) can't seem to see eye-to-eye with each other and will always try to annoy and irritate one another. Heh.. A lot of my girlfriends used to have a crush on him, so I can say that he is good-looking *OMG! I can't believe I just said that!* or they seriously should have their eyes checked. Kak Reena is my sweet sister-in-law who also have helped me a lot. She is very different from me because she is always very organised, well-prepared and uses colour-coordinated stuffs. Unlike me, the unorganised & messy chick.

The last person on my list will be Busu. Presently she's studying in Temasek Poly (my old school) and pursuing an IT diploma. She is 17 years old this year. I used to be close to her when she was in primary school but we drifted apart after that. As much as I wanted her not to end up jaded, cynical and broken like me, I would also like her to go out and explore the world to make her own judgement. I just hope that she will excel in whatever she puts her mind in.

My personal dislikes?
I can't stand stupid people. Let me define what I consider stupid before you people start hollering hokkien expletives to me.

If you can't spell, you are not stupid by default.
If you can't spell and have no intentions to improve yourself, then you are a moron.
If you can't spell and have no intentions in improving yourself and when I pointed out the error to you, you starts to spew weak & stupid reasons to defend your mistakes............... then you are a bloody moron. No one can help you unless you pull yourself out of that sh*thole you've dug up for yourself..
I know the difference between a typo and an obvious spelling error, thank you very much. By the way, I know I am not perfect either, so let me know if I've made any spelling or grammar mistakes in my posts and I'll be eternally grateful.

I can't stand road hoggers who hog the over-taking lane. If you think that by driving on that lane within the legal speed limit of 90kmph is sufficient, then you are dead wrong. Arghhhhh!
OTHER VEHICLES NEED TO USE THAT LANE FOR OVERTAKING! THAT IS WHAT THAT LANE IS FOR, YOU IDIOT! THAT LANE IS NOT FOR YOU TO CRUISE LEISURELY!! STOP HOGGING THAT &^%$ING LANE, YOU OBNOXIOUS MORON!
I will not hesitate to flash my dainty little middle finger at you once my hubby overtakes you dangerously on your left! The usual culprit seems to be taxi drivers and tai-tais driving luxury sedan.

There's also a group of people that I really dislike. I refer to these individuals as 'Toxic Turd' due to the fact that most of the things that came out of their mouth are foul-smelling words that is delivered to hurt the recipient's feeling.
Let me give you a fine example: Aisah gave me this blouse that is black & white, with huge sleeves that kinda look 'Japanesey' (Got such word?). I like it very much, wore it to work a few times and received compliments for it. But there's this toxic turd at work who said, 'Eh, you wear that tablecloth to work again ah?'. Obviously, she's jealous that she can't fit into this tablecloth because of all the disgusting lard hanging around her body. Me, being all so gracious & nice, just smiled at her and looked away. But you can imagine the turmoil going around in my head. I came up with hundreds of witty and sarcastic rebuttals to bombard her and render her speechless. One of my favourites was, 'Gosh [insert toxic turd's name here] , don't tell me you are pregnant AGAIN? How far along are you? 8 months?'. Ouch~
I honestly believe that these toxic individuals are placed on earth with a sole purpose to bash up and crush your self-esteem & self-worth. What to do when you encounter these turds? You can always counter-attack their comments by coming up with an equally painful remarks about their appearance, or you can just ignore them and let them be.

Once again, I got carried away and bore my beloved readers with such a lengthy post.

Au revoir~

Another death within a week..

Remember when I blogged that someone's mother had fallen down in the bathroom and was warded in the ICU?

Well, she didn't make it. She passed away last Saturday night and her funeral was held on Sunday afternoon.

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Rajioun~

Sigh.. And it's only the 12th day of June.
Aisah told me that her colleague's daughter's baby died after it was delivered. I am using the term 'it' because I am not sure of the baby's sex.. I can't imagine the mother's anguish after finding out that the baby is dead after delivering it. *sob* *sob* She must have been crushed..

However, here are some good news to cheer me up~
After the funeral yesterday, we drove to Kallang to visit my parents. Mom's left eye have recovered fully. Alhamdulillah~ She can see clearly through it and it's not red anymore. Nor does it hurt any longer.
My sis and nieces were there as well, which made the visit even more joyful. I missed Huda soooooo much~ Hehehe.. She's so cute and so well behave. How on earth did my sis train her to be like that? Hub can just pick her up to cuddle her and she didn't freak out. And I love the way hub handle her.. *Sigh wistfully* I wish I can just bring her home with me. Tempting sia~~ To kidnap my own niece?? Hahaha.. Let's hope she can fit in my purse.

Another good news is that the gender of my sis's baby is known already. IT'S A BOY! Oh boy oh boy oh boy! *chuckles*
I think Abg Yunos must have been jumping for joy once he heard the news. That's because I myself nearly jumped out of my chair last friday when the kids msn me about it! We didn't really say anything much after the news that my sis was pregnant again broke out. When my aunt confided in me that she had a dream that the baby is a girl, she cautioned me not to tell my sister. Everyone had their lips tightly sealed, in case they are going to be disappointed again. It's not that baby boys are better than baby girls, but I can understand why someone who already have 4 daughters would yearn for a son.
But the question is, how my sis is going to handle all the 5 kids? With 2 babies? I'll be glad if she allow me to take care of 1 of it.. Especially Huda.. *grins* She's such a joy to be with!

Another thing.. I don't think it's a good news.. and I don't think it can be categorised under bad news either. It really depends lah..
I think my little sister have a boyfriend. *scratch head* But she denied it and insist that he's just a friend. Like duh~~~ *roll eyes* She must have thought that I was just born yesterday.
.. Been there, done that ..
Me & hub saw them under the block, sitting and talking at the bench downstairs. But she brought along 2 of my nieces as chaperones. Lol!
I am worried. I have tonnes of advices to give to her but I know that if I am not careful, it might fall onto deaf ears.

I hope she reads my blog, though.

Ila, here are my words of wisdom.. Chet! macam betul jer aku ni ;p~

Be smart, gal.. I know that I haven't been the best role model but at least let my painful experiences be a lesson to you.
Men will always say things that you wanted to hear. They'll whisper sweet nothings into your ears that will make you believe things they wanted you to believe. The truth is, they may have other plans in their sick & twisted little minds. There are loads of wolves dressed in sheeps' clothing. Be wary of these wolves, dear~..

But then again, bear in mind that not all men are like that.. There are some who will respect you and will never take advantage of you. Men who will take 1 step at a time, never rushing you and helping you to make sense of strange things that happens in life because they see the world from the other side of the river and they understand things that we women never will. These men are considered to be rare gems and it is up to you to see & judge for yourself.

I can't and will never be able to control what you say or do.
Kau dah besar, nak~ Pepandai lah kau jaga diri..
Because I'd been where you are right now and the more I was controlled, the more I rebelled. And that is the last thing I want you to do.
I just hope that you are smart enough not to repeat my mistakes. I'd wasted a lot of time, energy and money on useless guys who........... are really not worth it at all *Grrr.. those @#$&%!*

Anyway, I am not saying that you can't make any mistakes at all.
Go forth and explore.. It's been historically proven that human learn a lot more from their own errors than from other people's experiences. The trick is, to know why it happens and not to repeat them..
Sis, I want you to know that you can always approach me for help or advices. If you think that by confiding in bestfriends are going to help you, well.. think again. My ex-bestfriends' bad advices were the ones that always landed me into trouble previously. Although I can't blame them 100% because they meant well.

Contrary to what you may have believed, I am actually an easy-going and open-minded sister. I've spent a lot of time being with colourful people from all blocks of life, that nothing you say or do can ever make my jaw drop in awe/disgust/shame/envy. Let's hope that would never happen, ok? It's a different ball game altogether when sh*t happens to your own flesh and blood. Heh~
Oh ya, just want to let you know that talking to you nowadays have become a tad more tolerable ever since we don't live under the same roof anymore.

Hahaha..
Sad but true..

Tata for now~~

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Rajioun

~Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilayhi Rajioun~
:: We are from Allah and to Allah we shall return ::

A life was lost yesterday..
What a waste.. Such a waste..

I mourn for you..
I mourn for your lost love..
I mourn for your lost son..
I mourn for your lost brother..
I mourn for your lost friend..
I promised myself that I would not cry..
When I see all of you breaking down and cry from the pain and the guilt..
I just couldn't stop myself.. It's only natural..
But all the tears in the world is not going to make him come back again..

I heard so many voices yesterday..
'He's so young..'
'He's so stupid..'
'He's so romantic..'
'He's so brave..'
'What a moron..'
'What he is trying to prove..'
I bite my tongue and reserve my comments..
Who am I to judge your actions?
No one knows what really happened.. only you..
We can only speculate what you'd done to yourself based on the series of events that look like a huge jigsaw puzzle to us..

I just hope that you will finally find the peace that you've been looking for..
I shall pray for you.. May Allah forgive you.
Amin.

:: RIP ::
1978 ~ 2006

Who is afraid of the dark?

Last night, hub played a mean trick on me. He was acting all creepy and looked at me in a scary way. I was watching Seinfeld on Starworld when he switched the TV off. We were teasing each other earlier on and he had hidden the TV remote control. So I just walked over to the TV and turn it on by using the buttons on it.
After that, he switched the TV off from the main switch, gave me a creepy smile and rolled his eyes (to show the white side of his eyes). I hate it whenever he did that kinda thing because it reminded me of my mean older brother who love to frighten me when I was a little girl.
When I ignored him and went to the toilet, he switched off the lights while I was inside! I quickly ran out of the bathroom and sat on the bed because I was afraid of the dark. He then proceeded to give me that same creepy smile and switched off ALL the lights in the bedroom. The only light that was available came from the PC green LED. The green LED flashes on and off continuously on hub's face and it also gave the dark room a creepy atmosphere. Hub kept on looking at my face with no expression on his face and it really frightened the hell out of me. *faint* I can't believe that I am afraid of my own husband.
I couldn't move my legs. My heart was beating very fast. I panicked so I did the most sensible thing I could think of at that moment...................................................................................

that is to cover my face with a pillow to avoid Azmi's creepy face and ...
....
....
....
cried like a little wussy! Hahahaha.. I felt so silly after everything was over. See, I told you that I am a scaredy cat!

Of course he apologised. His reason for doing that to me? He thought that I can face my fear and get it over with. So that he don't have to accompany me to the kitchen when I have to make myself a cup of milo in the middle of the night. Hahahahaha..

I can't help it lah. I have an hyperactive imagination. In the dark, with my poor night vision, I will imagine that the beige-coloured towel that is draped onto the computer chair is a lady in white looking at me with her bloodshot eyes. The terror can grip me so hard that I couldn't move a single muscle. This new fear started to plague me ever since I move to Ubi. When I was staying in Kallang, I could walk around in the dark even when the whole house was only illuminated by the stars in the sky. I know every bumps and every cracks in every corner of that house. I enjoyed being alone at night and could go to the bathroom without even turning on the lights.

Sigh..

Maybe I haven't really adjusted myself to this Ubi house. It's my first time staying in a big house whereas all my life I am used to a 3-room flat. In Ubi, I feel like I am being watched and I hated the deafening silence when I am all alone. I have to turn on the TV or the mp3 player to keep me company.. Which is a lot of difference because I used to enjoy the silent calming atmosphere in my old home.

I love the way my parents' bedroom looked like in the afternoon when the sun is shining onto the bed from the opened window. I love to lie down on their bed right where the sun is shining on because it's warm and it makes me feel like I am lying next to my mother. And whenever I used to lie down on my parents' bed to take a nap, there is this smell that comforted me. I can't describe the smell to you but I guess you can experience it yourself when you just take a deep whiff of a towel that was washed and hung to dry in the sun.

And if I were to smell something similar somewhere else, I feel like I am being transported back into that room with the sun shining on that bed. Then the feeling of emptiness / happiness / sadness will sometimes overwhelm me that it can bring tears to my eyes. But it depends on my mood at that time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Analysis of my handwriting..

I took a test to analyse my handwriting and here is my result. Surprisingly, a lot of it describe me kinda accurately. Especially about the procastinating, me being sarcastic and the sharp 'm' part. The truth hurts.. but I guess it's ok. I already know that I am the Queen of Procrastination. Lol!

For a graphologist, the spacing on the page reflects the writer's attitude toward their own world and relationship to things in his or her own space. If the inputted data was correct Ayu has left lots of white space on the all four borders of the paper. Ayu fills up just the center area of the page. If this is true, then Ayu has a particular shyness toward people and a fear of moving too fast in any direction. In some cultures, respecting people, rules, and adhering to protocol are ways of life. The right side of the page represents the future and the left side represents the past. Ayu seems a bit stuck in the middle, afraid to take action. Ayu seems to have a fear of looking bad or of crossing boundries. It will be easy to work with Ayu on a team, because Ayu will usually follow the rules. However, this desire to respect the boundries can often be construed as a lack of confidence and people will walk over Ayu if she is not careful.

Ayu has a healthy imagination and displays a fair amount of trust. She lets new people into her circle of friends. She uses her imagination to understand new ideas, things, and people.

Ayu is very self-sufficient. She is trying not to need anyone. She is capable of making it on her own. She probably wants and enjoys people, but she doesn't "need" them. She can be a loner.

Ayu has a tendency to put things off, Ayu procrastinates. She sometimes pretends to be busy, so she will not have to do whatever she is putting off. She is often late to appointments or deadlines. This usually leads to a great amount of effort at the last minute to meet the deadline. Procrastination is an important factor as it relates to her output on the job or at school. Remember, Ayu will put it off until later. Procrastination is easily overcome through a simple stroke adjustment in the handwriting.

Ayu is sarcastic. This is a defense mechanism designed to protect her ego when she feels hurt. She pokes people harder than she gets poked. These sarcastic remarks can be very funny. They can also be harsh, bitter, and caustic at the same time.

Ayu is a practical person whose goals are planned, practical, and down to earth. This is typical of people with normal healthy self-esteem. She needs to visualize the end of a project before she starts. she finds joy in anticipation and planning. Notice that I said she plans everything she is going to do, that doesn't necessarily mean things go as planned. Ayu basically feels good about herself. She has a positive self-esteem which contributes to her success. She feels she has the ability to achieve anything she sets her mind to. However, she sets her goals using practicality-- not too "out of reach". She has enough self-confidence to leave a bad situation, yet, she will not take great risks, as they relate to her goals. A good esteem is one key to a happy life. Although there is room for improvement in the confidence catagery, her self-perception is better than average.

Because Ayu has sharp needle pointed 'm' and 'n' humps, she has a very sharp mind. She instantly sizes up situations, making instant decisions. She thinks and evaluates circumstances very rapidly. Many people with this type of mind are geniuses, thus she may be seen as highly intelligent. Ayu is often irritated by slow talkers or slow thinkers. If she drives, she gets irritated by slow drivers in the fast lane. She quickly becomes bored when being taught on the level of the slowest student in class. She may be on problem number three when the rest of the class is on problem one. Ayu is curious and very active. In fact, in school she might have been a trouble maker because she thought so much faster than the other kids, she finished her work first, thus having plenty of time on her hands to make trouble!

Diplomacy is one of Ayu's best attributes. She has the ability to say what others want to hear. She can have tact with others. She has the ability to state things in such a way as to not offend someone else. Ayu can disagree without being disagreeable.

Ayu is secretive. She has secrets which she does not wish to share with others. She intentionally conceals things about herself. She has a private side that she intends to keep that way, especially concerning certain events in her past.

Ayu uses judgment to make decisions. She is ruled by her head, not her heart. She is a cool, collected person who is usually unexpressive emotionally. Some may see her as unemotional. She does have emotions but has no need to express them. She is withdrawn into herself and enjoys being alone. The circumstances when Ayu does express emotions include: extreme anger, extreme passion, and tremendous stress. If someone gets her mad enough to tell her off, she will not be sorry about it later. She puts a mark in her mind when someone angers her. She keeps track of these marks and when she hits that last mark she will let them know they have gone too far. She is ruled somewhat by self-interest. All her conclusions are made without outside emotional influence. She is very level-headed and will remain calm in an emergency situation. In a situation where other people might get hysterical, she has poise. Ayu will work more efficiently if given space and time to be alone. She would rather not be surrounded by people constantly. In a relationship, she will show her love by the things she does rather than by the things she says. Saying "I love you" is not a needed routine because she feels her mate should already know. The only exception to this is if she has logically concluded that it is best for her mate to hear her express her love verbally. Ayu is not subject to emotional appeals. If someone is selling a product to her, they will need to present only the facts. They should present them from a standpoint of her sound judgment. She will not be taken in by an emotional story about someone else. She will meet emergencies without getting hysterical and she will always ask "Is this best for me?"

People that write their letters in an average height and average size are moderate in their ability to interact socially. According to the data input, Ayu doesn't write too large or too small, indicating a balanced ability to be social and interact with others.

I got this from Songde's blog. So if you want to get your handwriting analysed, just click on this link --> http://www.handwritingwizard.com/main.phtml
My advice to you before you attempt to take the test is to write a few paragraphs on a piece of blank paper.

BUZZzzzzz...

I've been a busy little bee lately. Been buzzing around in the office and at home. So many things have happened and yet I can't find the time to write about it.

Let me recall..
30/05/06 - While I was at work, I received an sms from Pak Busu saying that my grandfather had fall down and his head was bleeding profusely. If you can refer to the previous post about how someone I know is in a coma because of a fall, you can imagine how I freaked out when I read that message. Then when I called him on the phone, he sounded like he was in a panic. Gosh.. It was another 30 mins before I could go home. Couldn't think straight. My elder sister sms the same thing to me. They tried contacting my brother but his handphone was off. So I called Azmi and tell him that we need to rush to Lakeside after work to see Atok.
He was finally wheeled to the clinic and thank God nothing bad happened. He just needed a few stitches on his head for the cut. Everyone was there except for my mom. She needed to rest at home because she was supposed to have an operation the next day.

31/05/06 - Mom went for cataract operation on her left eye. It was supposed to be a simple operation but end up my mom kept on vomitting hours after she was operated on. Luckily me and hub was there to help her. The nurse had to give her a special injection to keep the food down but it didn't work. She kept throwing up whatever the nurse gave to her. So we decided to just hurry up and bring her back home. On the way back, she nearly vomitted in hub's car.
But after eating a bowl of porridge, the vomitting bouts stopped and then I let her lie down and rest. Cian mak..
As for me, dah lah penat kat spital belom hilang, then I have to clean the house in Kallang and cook and make sure everything was ok before I left for Ubi. Mom said that this operation is more painful than the one performed on her right eye. We brought this up to the doctor but she can't find anything abnormal. After a few days later, Mom said that it's feeling a bit better so there was no need to worry.

01/06/06 - 05/06/06
My partner was on leave, so I was kept on my toes at work. Due to the heavy workload, migraine managed to sneak in to give me hell. Gulped down 2 tabs of Pacofen with 2 cups of coffee to keep myself sane and alive.

The weekend was relaxing for me though. We stayed at home lazing around, doing laundry and playing games on the xbox. We were supposed to send my grandfather to JB but my aunt cancelled it at the last minute. There was a wedding dinner of hub's friend to attend to but we didn't go since he have to be on standby for a server migration at work. Haiz...
We didn't even go to my dad's relatives' wedding in JB because of this. So we just send our regards to them through my mom.

Oh ya.. Kak Hafizah finally getting married on 27th Aug this year. I am so excited for her. Hehehe. I can't wait to go to her wedding in KL because I heard her wedding theme is going to be almost the same as mine.
And then there's another wedding to attend to in Melaka during the same month. *scratch head*
This one must attend because the bride is Cik Nor's youngest sister. Cik Nor and her family had helped me a lot during my wedding by providing me with the yummy dodol as wedding favours to my guests. I really appreciated all their help so it means I have to 'rewang' for this wedding. It's been so long since I really get my hands dirty during a wedding. The last time I really helped out was for Abang's wedding. That was like eaons ago. And I didn't really help much because it was held during my poly exam period and I had to rush off to make time to study.

Fuh! So many weddings to attend to.. ;p~

Signing Off~~